Sign inside a bookshop close to my guesthouse

Today was the big day for which I had actually come to Phnom Penh. Mariam, a teacher in Phnom Penh and one of the local couchsurfers, had invited anyone who was interested to witness a Cambodian wedding to one of her students’ marriage. I still hadn’t heard from Talita, and I knew she really wanted to come for this; so I sent her a reminder email.

Today was the third day of this three-day-long wedding, and I made it to the agreed-upon meeting place at the agreed-upon time. To my surprise, Echo, who had vanished in Siem Reap after fighting with the old tuk-tuk driver, was also there. No-one else turned up; so Mariam drove the two of us to the wedding hall. We were among the early guests to arrive, for arrangements for the actual ceremonies were still underway.

Nobody spoke any English, but everyone was very warm and welcoming. This is a huge learning I have had since embarking upon my travels. People who have to constantly deal with tourists are almost never genuinely nice, but once you’re off the regular tourist circuit you experience far more geniality. We were guided to one of the many round tables placed in the hall. There were about 9 chairs arranged around each table. Each table had water, beer and other soft drinks along with the silverware. We were free to drink anything we wanted, and as soon as any bottle got empty, it was promptly replaced. Just so that we don’t feel alienated, people asked around for an English speaking person and brought him to our table to speak to us for a while.

The round tables being set up

It appeared that the Khmers didn’t really do a “cheers” before drinking, and they looked surprised when Echo and I did. In fact they seemed to like it so much that after that, they did it every 5 minutes for the next hour or so till we were done with dinner. Mariam could not stay for the entire ceremony as she had a class to conduct. But before leaving, she informed us that food would not be served at a table until all the seats around it were taken. For this reason, incoming guests are always guided to empty seats at partially occupied tables. As soon as the last seat at our table was occupied, food began to appear magically. Each table was like a mini-community and everyone dug into the food-laden plates in the middle with their chopsticks.

Our table

Of all the tables, I could sense that ours was special. It had two foreigners after all, and the locals at our table seemed to be proud of this fact. Indians are generally not champion chopstick users, and I am no exception. Echo, however, is Chinese and she could handle the chopsticks as deftly as the Cambodians. So in that respect, I probably stuck out as a sore thumb in the entire marriage hall. I was petrified every time my plate was empty and I had to fetch something from one of the shared food bowls in the middle. I must have looked like a kid balancing his food on the two thin sticks and breathing a sigh of relief each time it successfully made it to the plate. On one of the occasions that it didn’t, a piece of chicken landed in my beer glass. It was embarrassing to fish it out of the glass, but that piece of chicken did taste interesting. Others at my table found my clumsiness amusing, but were sporty enough to encourage me whenever I successfully managed to get something in my mouth. I am also super grateful to the lady sitting next to me who often helped me to put stuff on my plate and made sure my glass was never empty.

Another notable feature about the food was the almost complete lack of vegetarian dishes on offer. From the looks of it, vegetarians would have had to be content with just plain rice and salad. Even among the non-vegetarian options, there were some really strange looking dishes that I guess could look scary to many people. Fortunately for me, I belong to the category of those who can stuff their faces with just about anything under the Sun.

Fish

Mariam had said that she would return to pick us up around 8.30 pm, but Echo couldn’t wait that long and left. So I sat at a corner of the hall, opened my netbook and started updating this blog.

The main entrance

The bride & groom with some other guests

After about an hour or so, there was a sudden flurry of activity, and the bride and groom appeared at the entrance. From there they walked to the main stage while the guests showered flowers on them. Soon people started gathering near the stage and dancing. Interestingly, irrespective of the tempo of the music being played, the dance was always slow and easy; almost as if everyone was deliberately moving in slow motion.

I wanted to join in the dancing, but was too shy to go by myself. Once Mariam got there, we joined the people dancing. Dancing so slowly seemed strange in the beginning, but it was so easy and relaxing, that I thoroughly enjoyed myself later on. People seeing me dance had huge grins on their faces, and many came up to me to shake hands or pat my back.

Slow dancing Khmer style

It is customary in Cambodian weddings for attending guests to drop some money into a box marked for donations. This money is given to the bride’s father to help cover some of the wedding expenses. One cannot assign a value to the amazing kindness and hospitality that had been extended to me over the course of the evening. But I still wanted to do my bit, so before leaving, I made sure to put a generous amount of money in an envelope and drop it into the box.

Mariam dropped me off close to my guesthouse, and I thanked her for having given me the opportunity to have such a great new cultural experience; possibly a once-in-a-lifetime event for a poor Indian traveller.